Research, my love, when I imagine you.. I could only think about art, enjoyment of learning, understanding complex realities and manifestations of all three. I thought IB curriculum would be a good choice on which I can place my trust. But then I started to share the idea with others and got responses like, “Think PRAGMATIC”; “Its not PRAGMATIC”; “Make it PRAGMATIC”; “PRAGMATISM is the key for graduate research.” It started my eternal disgust for the word.. 

Can a person be pragmatic in love, that I would ask? But then you weigh things in order to devise that perfect recipe. Recipe which sounds good on paper, looks good as an idea.

What about research on research methods. Seems a beautiful idea, I was excited as a wanderer; obviously love is blind. Upon the touch of love, everyone becomes a poetic. But the world is not filled with poets.. PRAGMATIC, PRAGMATIC, make it doable, PRAGMATIC; rhyming quatrain does not make the world and its inhabitants poetic. There I announced firaaq [a separation] till the right time comes.

The supervisor thought that I should revert back to IB curriculum and so I united with my first love again, not ART but IB which is not less than a piece of art IMHO. But what to study in IB? Research filled with questions. It first annoys you and then you and your supervisor annoy each other with questions and finally these annoy your research participants. Annoy-ing in a good way, certainly!

So coming back to the question.. I would be studying student autonomy by exploring how Theory of Knowledge helps student autonomy which then becomes knower’s autonomy and whether knower is considered autonomous or not. I would be studying knower’s trajectories of autonomy. It became pragmatic, something which can add value to the CV, wohooo but again a complex subject. I love complex stuff I guess :p

However, to explain it in terms of proposal was not easy, kind of frustrating. Who would like to read so much, write so much, and drink so much – coffee yummmm. Is proposing ever easy?! You need to have the perfect words which never can be that perfect. The amount of reading and writing and coffee that was consumed couldn’t help my mom but to remark “PhD nahi karna, abhi hi pagal hogaya hai” which can be loosely translated into “Don’t do PhD, you have already become a lunatic!”

Thanks to my supervisor I finally discovered what is Theoretical Framework and my research had quite a simple one.. duh!! I felt quite stupid about not being able to pin it.

By the time I {re}wrote research question.. the idea of trajectory takes a back seat, though it still is a driving force. Now answer and explanation to life’s many problems are articulated by me through domains of autonomy and trajectory.. lol. That is called obsession.

So I proposed on 11.11.11 {i.e. submitted the research proposal}, the title says “Tracing spaces of Knower’s Autonomy in International Baccalaureate Curriculucm”. The in-laws [reviewers :p] came after a week, I proudly presented my case in good clothes and the deal was done Baat pakki hogayi tou the librarian now wants some mithai [sweets] :p

My review was less on ideas and it resonated something of this sort.

So I am back to work. Happiness is short-lived. I hope I keep my promises {of proposal}.

Nevertheless, research is a messy business. I hope you clicked the links, it has comics – nerdy comics called PhD Comics though I am not a doctorate student :p They’re so much fun!! at least for me

ps: I am a lazy e-potato. Isn’t it just a start

I feel the melancholy

of what cannot be seen;

yet evident upon itself.

I can see the fairy lights

calling fairies to dance

upon the tune of a piano

to take away the pain

-and offer it to violin.

I wonder, converse-ly

‘what be left then

to call my own?’

hitherto a bokeh.

[29/30-10-11]

“As soon as there is a label, the ideas disappear and out comes label-worship and label-bashing, and instead of living by a theme of ideas, people begin dying for labels… and the last thing the world needs is another religion.” -Richard Bach

The world is getting categorical day by day, people can’t stand free-spiritedness. The worst that has happened to mankind is that now people are afraid of being just themselves even if they are not harming others because in the end either their image or esteem would be harmed by labels given by other people. It is a contagious and sustainable disease, both borne and propogated by humans.

The most courageous task is not being judgmental and accepting the ‘other’ as s/he is. As a result, the person ceases to be the ‘other’.

A true story.

It turned out to be a bitter-sweet symphony.

Wasted everything in Bulletino festival – oo ouch, take the world and paint it red. In the end it’s a mess.

To wrap it up, a lullaby to help you sleep;

with love, not on target.

Happy International Women’s Day

[25-12-11] Jesus is an artist for me with ethereal qualities. His art was love; he was created from and out of love, he embodied love and consumed himself through and in love.

This Eid, like every year, thousand of animals are slaughtered. The rationale behind the ritual is apparently the spirit of sacrifice which unfortunately has gone completely haywire over the years, so much so that it has become a mockery which laughs at its own grandeur. The festival traces back its origin to Abrahamic tradition where the idea was to sacrifice what is most dear to you, for Abraham: his son Ishmael. Traditionally, monotheists especially Muslims used to pet animals for years and sacrifice the one at Eid which was dearest to them which can be categorized as one of the most humbling human expressions. In this day and age, it is neither possible nor relevant to practice the tradition in similar manner. Therefore in our times, the concept behind sacrifice becomes greater than the sacrifice itself and is needed to be understood.

Sadly, this ritual which should be conducted with spiritual zeal has been reduced to a display of shameless pomp and it seems that the essence of sacrifice has either been forgotten or perhaps had never been understood in first place. What people don’t realize is that the prayer (Namaz-e-Eid) is obligatory and not the sacrifice itself or more precisely the physical one. Offering an animal in sacrifice is only proposed for those who have the means, yet many people feel forced by societal pressures to do so.

The biggest animal sacrifices in terms of quantity are carried out by two groups the locally rich individuals or pilgrims at the Hajj. It is known observation for former – many of them if not all – it has become a symbol of status. The more the merrier, obviously fatter the better. Sacrifice can only be complete with inherent feelings of thankfulness and submission. When you forgo something dear, especially if it’s a big animal, you aren’t supposed to setup a show where whole neighborhood is enjoying the slaughter with claps or hoots and children are exposed to bloodshed. People prefer to keep the best of the meat for themselves and some even buy additional freezers to preserve; no wonder greed has no limits. Deprived people who actually wait for this day throughout year as they can’t afford the luxury of meat on daily basis are conferred with bad parts and wished with Meat Mubarak! Besides, there are mass scale wastages in sacrifices at Hajj and also internationally across the ummah. Governments or civil society also doesn’t have any system in place where more effective use and distribution of meat can be done. Not to say that every sacrifice is carried in such manner but mainly we need to remind ourselves that God likes humility so He also dislikes wastefulness. The issues of sacrifice then have implications on national and ummah context.

In all this drama, Eid-ul-Adha becomes a mere exoteric ritual with little sense of sacrifice itself. All this is not unknown but it becomes a greater sham by occurrence of incidents like recently when an ‘educated’ host on some television channel’s Eid special comments on how the goat which one only buys a day before the Eid has no emotional value so those who really want to sacrifice, should do so by giving away their handbags and diamond rings which one loves dearly. In such state, I personally think that we don’t have ANY right to whine about situations we face in our country because as a nation to the individuals who really can contribute towards change just want to blab. How would a country progress where the income disparity in the country is so large, where we haven’t invested in sectors like education and health, where we haven’t nurtured our glorious tradition of scholarship in religion? Where we blame everything upon extremists and foreign involvements while assuming no accountability over our own lacking? How many of us are committed to share than accumulate whether its money, skills or knowledge? Is sacrifice really running in our blood?

To understand the essence of sacrifice we not only need to refer back to history but also reflect upon the context. Prophet Abraham was the one who brought a paradigm shift from paganism to monotheism. Human sacrifice was a major facet of pagan practices. Modern scholarship and likes of Karen Armstrong believe that the story of sacrifice of Abraham highlights that God doesn’t need the flesh of humans and therefore it was replaced with a sheep. It emphasis on the sanctity of humanity and human life which was ignored by the primitive religions. Briefly, all you can offer to God is your love and devotion. Later on in the history, the problem with Arabs was not limited to Idol worshipping or oneness of God but worshipping their own selves as the most powerful and therefore exploiting the deprived; absence of humility disrespects the principle of Tawheed which Prophet Mohammad wanted to correct. Islam’s purpose is not only to enlighten us about divine but also install ethics of forgiveness, love and compassion. It also reminds me of a speech that I read where His Highness Aga Khan said, “The shared destiny of the ethos of the Abrahamic tradition that unites Christians, Jews and Muslims is governed by the duty of loving care to help nurture each life that is born to its God-given potential.”

Any ritual has two powers, one is to inspire if the learning reflects back in your daily ethics or else the power of making you immune to blind imitation, whatever the devotee chooses. In current trying times, we need to revisit our religion and rethink our practice of the whole ritual and notion of sacrifice. Is it only limited to slaughtering animals? The answers would vary but whatever they maybe, they should be based on proper knowledge and informed action. We also need a different kind of sacrifice working hand in hand with the traditional. In my opinion, putting millions on food, shelter and education is much more needed. It would need time and effort but the question remains that are we really ready to sacrifice?

[The piece was written last year. The only change is that now we have cows named after Star Plus characters. Pratigya, what should one suppose? a hindu cow for a muslim sacrifice? This can begin a whole new debate on cultural sensitvity.]

Aisha *

Nothing much to write about. Justifying this would be a sin. Amanat Ali himself wasn’t sure of doing this as we can make out from the Behind the Scene footage. His singing style doesn’t fit the mood of song and lyrics are epic fail; in such state house band can’t come to your rescue. Bad start.

Moomal Rano (THE GEM) *****

This track takes the cake as the best of the second episode. @SohailAbid at twitter describes the feel perfectly:

Listen to the song Momal Rano with your eyes closed. It’s not what you hear usually / Sindhi (folk) music has a special quality. As if it’s desert that’s singing, not the men.

Fakir Juman Shah with his troupe takes our spirit to another world; most will not understand a word of it but still you’re moved by it. Moreover it is like folk trance which reflects in the way they move their hands on instrument, captures the rhythmic aesthetic of samaa. Their continuous singing reminds you of the infinite and you can’t help but move with the track. A music journalist in Dawn Images wrote: “Had Fakir Juman Shah’s troupe performed Moomal Rano anywhere else, I would perhaps have enjoyed their show. For the simple reason that in CS, you expect something fresh and new added to the original song. In this case, the folk group (that has done many tours abroad including a recently-concluded tour of Australia), performed Moomal Rano just as they would have anywhere else. The pace of the song was unusually slow and the energy was missing.” I enjoy her reviews and she has a right to have an opinion but I believe that House Band brought a great feel to the song with the percussion and keyboards which you won’t get elsewhere. Most of the audience would have listened this for first time so I guess it was very appropriate to experiment with instrumentation and doesn’t take the soul away of the troupe’s performance. The ‘new’ doesn’t necessarily have to be both ways. As far the issue of being slow and low-energy is concerned, I refer you to the tweet above. If you make it Alif Allah Chambay Di Booty, it would lose the flavor. Post note: I imagined how would a Flamenco performance look on this beautiful rendition.

The high moment: Fakir Juman Shah kissing his instrument in the end.

Tann Dolay ***

The repetitive lyrics in Noori songs are a big problem as highlighted in this blog post titled ‘Too much of Tan dolay Man bolay can be bad for you’. I wish they don’t come up next with a song on tolay aur cholay. Jokes apart, I really like the melody of this song and Haniya is top-notch here. Zeb and Ali Noor also play their part very well. Ali Hamza got little bit into excitement and forgot that he actually had to sing and not cry (happily) like a crow. All in all it is a nice song and worth listening minus Ali Hamza. Okay he is forgivable, not that bad; maybe his style doesn’t match up with the other three and disrupts harmony. The song ends on a displeasing note, too much of wavering  ‘jaa’aaaan’ but Zeb finally hits the correct note and the song is saved.

The high moment: Haniya’s first line. It was killer!

Bolo Bolo ****

If you have a problem with Anglo accent of the lead singer of Entity Paradigm (E.P.) then I can’t help you. People hated the fact that song got experimented and for many the treatment went out of hands. Many complained that we are missing fusion in most of the tracks. I believe Coke Studio is more about experimentation, fusion is just a part of it.  People need fresh and new stuff and when E.P. is coming up with a soft rock version, everyone’s complaining. I find the original track very cheesy and I am being honest. Both the track and EP diverted from both the usual Coke Studio and band’s feel which turned everyone into a critic. In my opinion, they tried something different and nailed it. In fact, Fawad captured the emotion of song better than Sajjad Ali, hate me for this if you want. No points for Ahmed Ali Butt, he never got any from me anyways.

The high moment: The slower version which starts at 2:50

Naina De Akhay ****

Most of the people loved this track so did I. Some complained and honestly, they know more about music. The song was thought to be an insult to the form of Qawali, the actual genre of Rizwan and Moazzam, which Late Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan also sang. My take on it’s treatment is that I actually enjoyed avoidance of shouts and loud claps. It was more soulful and less aggressive. The song matures with every alaap that duo attempted. The drums overtook the function of claps whereas guitars replaced the shout and  lifted the song.

The high moment: Sajan Bin Raata Hoeyan Waddiyan

We all need to understand that Coke Studio stands for celebrating diversity in music and their strength is experimentation. It would be reflect in various forms whether it is giving chance to new musicians, putting folk in limelight, trying hands on fusion, playing with genres and instrumentation and sometimes even bringing raw/new songs/compositions on plate. If you are trying to look out for the same kind of stuff they gave you in previous seasons then you need to rethink about it’s spirit. Think is it more important to produce fusion music and the WILL for experimentation to explore broadened horizons? Whatever the case maybe, Coke Studio has redeemed itself with it’s third offering titled conception.